As ridiculous as it seems, I have PBD. This time last week all I thought I would be ecstatic to be done with the bar. You can image how surprised I was when I woke up on Thursday morning feeling nearly as stressed as when I woke up on Wednesday morning. I assumed that would gradually pass. It didn’t. And I spent the rest of the day moping on my couch and declining calls from friends and family (if I screened you don’t feel bad, I screened literally everyone). I was so distressed that I skipped yoga class, but by the end of the day Thursday, I was feeling a little better. Friday morning I got up and went to the gym and expected that my good mood would continue. I was wrong. PBD returned a couple of hours after the gym.
Why?
After talking with a couple of friends, I noticed that we were all a little “off” after the bar. For the most part, we don’t know what to do and that’s distressing! The last three years and especially the last three weeks have been a marathon of studying all leading up to one huge test: the bar. But now that we’re done, there’s nothing to study, nothing to do, and feel a little purposeless. And that feeling of purposelessness, as if there is literally no goal to work toward, nothing to accomplish, is PBD.
And it sucks! I don’t think this is because I have a hard time relaxing (although that may be part of it), but now that I don’t have something to do everyday nothing is getting done! I decided on Friday to clean my house. It’s now Monday and all that I have done is unload and reload the dishwasher. Quite a task, I know, but I think a 4 day turnaround on a load of dishes is some sort of record.
I can slowly feel the PBD lifting though. I’m getting used to not having something that must be done everyday and it’s pretty nice not having a terrible event like the bar hanging over my head. And in just a few minutes I’m going to my first post-bar yoga class. So very very slowly I’m returning to the land of the living.
Wish me luck!
Falling in Dead Level 
So a priest, a rabbi, and a law student walked into a bar. "Holy Jesus!," said the priest as he bumped his head."Oy Vay!," said the rabbi as he bumped his head.Surveying the damage, the law student whips out two neck braces and says, "I think this bar is in for some forced tithing… just as soon as I get my results back."
Nice.
Yep, PBD sounds about right. I go back to work today which I think will be good. Positives to consider:+ You have a job+ You don't have nothing to do, like some others, til Sept. 1 start date.+You have hubby.Negatives:-Oct. 9 is a long way off-Big Love isn't on NetFlix
I have been resorting to doing very un-like me things. For example: working on a scrapbook of my engagement (yes, that was two years ago), making complicated meals from scratch and putting together photo collages. Odd choices, I know, but it makes me feel somewhat purposeful.